Bird by Bird

I like to write, granted I’m sometimes horrible (majority of it). But that’s not the point. Almost everything that I write is from my heart. It is something that has been on my mind and tearing at my insides. Oddly enough, I write mostly poetry, it’s an attribute that defines me. Ask just about anyone that I’ve known for more than three months, and they’ll tell you, “Erica is almost always writing in one of her notebooks”. A funny story, I graduated early, worked really hard for it, but I still went backed and walked with my class (bunch of wild losers). Well, my boss lived about an hour from work, he just finished college a few years ago, and he tells me, “I’m going home this weekend, what would you like for graduation?” I’m shocked and have no idea what to say, I tell him he doesn’t have to get me anything; he argues that he does because this is a big step in my life. Well, that next Monday Mr. Mo comes back, calls me into his office and gives my present. I creative writing journal, one of those magnetic ones, along with a new journal, and a gift card for barnes and nobles. I’m very grateful for the presents mind you, but I had to ask why journals, his reply “you’re always writing. Half of the time I can’t get you stop and get back to work”. Mr. Mo is a funny guy.

What this story has to do with Lamott’s few chapters here is that she says to find someone who is encouraging of your writing, who will criticize it, but not just to criticize it alone but to actually help you. And that’s what my boss did. He had read a few of my short stories and a few of my poems, and he was encouraging me to continue writing. I remember him telling me just before leaving for Wisconsin to remember to write down all of my thoughts and ideas, no matter how emotional they get, don’t be afraid to let them out. If it’s something that will hurt someone, write it down, but don’t give it to them. I was able to find someone who encourages my writing, whether it’s horrible or actually good. But like Lamott, and I have to agree with her, having one or two people read your work, that you actually trust is good to have. I have only ever had a few people that I trust with my writing, my three friends Aimee, Tama and Samantha, my ex boyfriend (his name isn’t important), and my coworker Jacob. Aimee, Sam, Tama and Jacob would give me constructive criticism, tell me what was good and tell me what was bad. They would suggest changes here and there and sometimes I’d take their advice, and sometimes I wouldn’t. They’d remind to go more in depth with a character or what I was feeling and trying to get across. But I think mostly, they wanted to steal my ideas…..I’m totally kidding.

Lamott reminds us to go deeper into what we’re writing, discover more about it, observe what’s around us. Don’t be afraid to dig deep, and don’t take your first impression or idea too seriously, but do remember to get them all down. And it doesn’t hurt not to be a stubborn, arrogant….use your imagination to continue this…and actually listen to what others have to say. Just because it’s your thoughts and emotions and it sounds concrete to you, doesn’t mean it is, it might still be a little foggy. So have a friend look over it, but don’t let the friend be a jackass about it.